* s t a r d u s t a g a i n s t a p a l e s k y *

A falling star is a phenomenon to an adult and magic- a miracle- to a child. Who's right? Things are what you define them. So who am I? I guess it's up to you...

2.08.2005

*I Stand Divided*

Welp. I'm really doing it. I'm going to bed before 1AM. It is literally the first time ever in the history of college with exceptions of welcome week, when I stupidly attended breakfast once and only once.

I am nervous about seeing the counselor on Friday. I'm beginning to think I shouldn't go. I have way too good a life to be depressed, how selfish am I to think that I have problems? I don't know. I don't know. I just don't know. I do think I have a condition, namely social anxiety disorder and clinical depression. I really think that, but I think they're just going to say its not there or its minor. I'm going to break down if they don't offer me drugs. I'm well aware that taking the drugs will psychologically make me better just by me thinking they're supposed to. Well that's fine with me. As long as there's no side effects, I don't care if its me convincing myself or drugs changing my brain chemistry. I freaking need some of that stuff on the commercial with the sad bouncy round guy. *sniffle*

riight. going to bed. sure, sure. thanks for the cd ben. and ill make an attempt at not being sangry at you if you actually do email me. but as of now, the sangriness continues.

Nannon I miss you like freaking crazy.

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