* s t a r d u s t a g a i n s t a p a l e s k y *

A falling star is a phenomenon to an adult and magic- a miracle- to a child. Who's right? Things are what you define them. So who am I? I guess it's up to you...

2.03.2005

*So You Sailed Away Into A Grey Sky Morning*

I may find in time that you were always right...

... send it in a letter, make yourself feel better :-P

I think some guys are sweet. Like genuinely well-intentioned and just good, good friends. Like, I miss Mark, I wish he'd call. I missed his last phone call and he hasn't called back since then. I haven't been quite as attached to my cell phone, so perhaps he's called more than that. Its weird because he never called me before.. like in my 4 years of working with him and being good friends with him, and then at the end of the year we were like good friends. But eh, i suppose good things don't always last. He's an awesome as hell friend, but I'm sure if I'm at Laura's again this summer I'll see him even if he's not working (which he claimed but hey, i don't believe it :-P)

I wasn't specifically talking about Mark but yea. It's weird cuz this kid in my Poetry class I thought looked like Mark and then he said his name and i was like.. woah.. it is Mark. But he's not as good looking. I mean uhh :-X lol

Mikey sent me pictures of himself being cute last night and they are currently making me happy. :-) him and his kitty are just too cute.

History is GONE (why do we have to study it?)

History is by far going to be my worst class, even worse than Freakin' Poetry.

I need to get changed into PJs because this whole getting dressed thing isn't going to last long. I haven't worn sweats to class yet-- blouses and black pants / jeans. Craziness and crazy different than what I'm used to. Why? Beats me. I don't have anyone to impress, I just feel better bout myself when I don't look like I never brush my hair (which is true! I haven't used a brush on my hair since i cut it!) lol.

I miss when Danielle and I were good friends and prank called Skippy (not a peanut butter) Adams. And played monopoly and watched Little Women.

Speaking of the completely over and way behind past, I dug up every poem I've ever written and brought them to school. Some stuff I still kinda like the sound of.

(side note: I definitely lost those 3 lbs again. Back to 105 again, I'm my hero for being freaking anorexic... not really :-D)

Yeah so back to poems. one of my faves:

Falling

Sinking, dying, all-out crying,
Screaming, yelling, I'm rebelling,
Sought out laughter, sulking after,
What to do when fate ain't selling?
Where's perfection? No attention
Black hole, empty, echoes plenty
Balanced lives, Gemini, bleeding heart's my alibi
Love is this, Don't dare wish
Falling. Calling. Bawling. Stalling.
Looking through, feeling blue,
Analyzing, always lying
eleven eleven Make a wish
Every one is the first kiss
Terror, Horror, Sadness, Sorrow
Sulking always, empty hallways
Red is angry, blue is cold
Everything that you've been told
Too much, as such, stay away, don't touch
Put yourself in their shoes
Don't cry, don't smile, please don't use
Hating, rating, no debating
Apologies and situating
Jusging him and judging her
Don't make sense or cause a stir
Shy, Lie, Cry, Die
Quiet's Deafening : Louder Sigh
<3>

That was an oldie but goody, one of those ones that i still kinda like the rhythm of (I despise poetry that doesn't have rhythm. It doesn't have to have specific structure at all - in fact i prefer that - but it has to roll off the tongue right)

Anyways, that's enough for now. I'm headaching, Mike's working on his car, and I'm hungry and sleepy. *YAWN*. Bedtime at 9:20.

HAHAHA. riight, like i'm not gonna watch ten things i hate about you right now. :-D Shannon I wish I had Titanic. lol

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